Weaponized Victim Power!

weaponized victimhood


Sweetie and I are both Aries. Though we appear to be quiet, we both have fiery personalities. I remember this most when we have little fights. Our emotions are hugely powerful, the energy in the room snaps with tension and the need to be heard.


I grew up in a family that forbade open fighting. If my sister and I argued, we’d both get in trouble and sent to our separate rooms – so this drove the fighting underground. I don’t know why this happened, but I’m sure it had something to do with parents wanting to protect their kids from conflict. Every family has it’s dynamics, this was ours: still waters have a damn powerful undertow. My emotion was something to hide and strategically release later on.


Sweetie grew up in a large family with FOUR older brothers. As the youngest by 12 years and the only girl, she had to learn to SHOUT to be heard. When we got together, these differing styles of reacting to conflict came into sharp relief. My icy silence with her volume. We both had to move towards the middle.


I brought the silence through my adulthood.  I *never* fought in any of my relationships prior to being with Sweetie. She had to actually teach me HOW to fight. And I had to teach her how to bring it down a notch. I think that ultimately, when you both want to be together, you’re both equally motivated to figure shit out.


A few weeks ago, Sweetie said something to me that probably would have blown up into a massive fight had she said any sooner:


“You position yourself as the victim. When you do that, I am the asshole, and that’s not fair to me.”


This may have been said at a loud volume.


It was a completely silly mini-fight, we were both tired and I was snippy because I’d expected her to realize I needed help with the groceries and skipped the part where I should have asked nicely. I went straight to cranky. Sweetie will throw cranky right back into my lap, she doesn’t take that shit from me for a second.


A few years ago, accusing me of “positioning myself as a victim” would have deeply upset me. I would have felt *wounded*. You know, victimized. I would have allowed the hurt of this statement to injure me and my pain would be proof of my innocence and status as a victim in this fight.


As soon as she said it, I could see she wanted to grab the words out of the air and stuff them back into her mouth. The words stopped our fight dead. I was stunned.


She was right.


In that moment, I realized I utilize my own sense of victimization to elevate myself in any conflict. I am the one done wrong here, I’m a good person with good intentions, therefore I *can’t* be the one at fault here. It’s this other person who’s doing me wrong.




I had no idea I was weaponizing my own victimization! And how messed up is that??? It’s probably the most toxic guilt trip you could ever throw at a loved one.


I’ve been thinking about it for weeks now, and I’ve started to see this tactic at play in other areas of my life. If and when someone positions themselves as being victimized by me, there’s not much I can do about it… Except feel victimized! For example, our previous landlady felt victimized by our use of the shared washer and dryer. To keep the peace and avoid conflict, I started to bike as big a bag of laundry as I could carry the 30 minutes into town to process it at the laundry mat. Talk about a martyr complex. I hate conflict so much, I’d rather bike in the rain with garbage bags of my clothes and spent an extra $40 a month so I can avoid one more conversation, feeling angry and victimized the entire time.


It’s interesting how two people can weaponize victimization in a single conflict. In grief, there is sometimes terrible fallout for families after losing a loved one, particularly a parent or child. I’ve previously talked about the very common question that comes up during readings: Does ____ see how ____ is behaving?


There is so much pain behind that question.


I’m working my way through the book “Nonviolent Communication”. I’m still learning how to shift my own tendency to position myself as a victim, and instead ask “What is my unmet need? What is the unmet need of this other person?”


The answers are not always obvious, and sometimes, we’re limited by the actions of other people. Like Sweetie & I are motivated by our mutual desire to get along and work things out, it’s hard to set aside your own power of victimization. Although Sweetie managed to perfectly time her illumination of my own victim complex, if she’d done that any earlier, I probably would’ve been mighty pissed. You can’t just take away someone’s weaponized victimhood. That would only super-charge it.


I really like Catherine’s comment in the previous entry. She said: I tend to diffuse potential heated confrontations nowadays by simply stating that I am unwilling to get into an argument, we have differing opinions, I respect theirs and we’ll have to agree to disagree. It’s like a firework being drenched in water : it fizzles out very quickly!


This is great in situations where you can walk away, where agreeing to disagree is an option. It’s a viable option in a lot of long-term relationships… but hey, I can only affect my own sense of victimization. I can only choose to disarm my own victim weaponization. If someone else wants to hold on to their own sense of injury because it helps them to feel more in-control, more powerful, well, the only thing we can do with that is not be victimized by that action. Break the cycle of weaponized victimization.


Lay down arms, accept, and observe. Maybe set up some boundary patrol.


Does this all make sense you guys? Have you ever caught yourself weaponizing your own victimization?



Off-Key Energy, or “Why do I care what they think???”

I have a good friend who experiences a lot of anxiety and worries about what people think about her. We had a really funny conversation that resulted in the sentiment “You just have to ration the fucks that you give. We only have so many fucks to give, use them wisely.” I needed this advice too.

I have been thinking about this idea incessantly for months, because it can feel like you HAVE TO care about what *certain* people in your life think of you. Preserving relationships is the only reason to give fucks when it doesn’t feel great to give them… and it’s a temporary solution at best. Hence the anxiety. You can’t just keep on giving your fucks away.

(Yes, my friend and I talk like sailors.)

A while back I did a post about “Bad Medicine”. The phrase “Bad Medicine” came from a friend’s spirit guide, where “good medicine” is a good intention / energy, and bad medicine is the reverse. “Medicine” differed from simply “energy” because energy is what is, the status quo. It’s such a useful phrase, but I feel uncomfortable using it because “Bad Medicine” can evoke racist images of Native Americans in John Wayne movies. I just can’t do it, and as a white person, I really, really shouldn’t.

So I’ll call it “Off-Key Energy.” Hey, it rhymes! On-Key Energy can signify thoughts, feelings, and prayers, both intentional and unintentional, which influence others positively. Off-Key Energy throws others off. Makes them cringe and they don’t know why. It’s unpleasant, it feels wrong.

We all have to deal with this. It might come from coworkers, friends, neighbours, family – whole communities and even the entire culture. Off-Key Energy is why we care what others think of us. It’s real energy, with real effects.

We give fucks because we’re trying to AVOID Off-Key Energy.

At some point, Off-Key Energy becomes unavoidable, or the amount of energy you’re putting into trying to control it is unsustainable. That’s when you have to STOP caring about whether this energy is generated or not – it’s coming.

Here’s why I don’t call it “Bad Energy”: It’s not necessarily bad. Those people having those thoughts about you, they’re having those thoughts based on the framework of their lived experience. It’s their reality. That’s why it’s so powerful! Here’s an extreme example:

I have been listening to audio book autobiographies of women who escaped the Fundamentalist Church of Latter Day Saints in the early 2000s. This extreme cult had / has communities in Utah, Arizona, Texas and British Columbia. A lot of their beliefs actually parallel Scientology – mind over matter, viewing illness as spiritual weakness, eschewing personal property for a shot at eternal salvation and their own *planets* in the afterlife.

The FLDS, however, sublimate women and girls to the level of property, and the result is a culture of human trafficking. It seems certain harmful practices have become much more extreme in the past 30 years, although the sect has been around for centuries.

I started to notice parallels in the women’s stories. Every time a girl or woman would escape, her entire community including her family would go to church and listen to sermons on how evil the escaped woman was. The whole community including her children would be ordered to pray for this woman’s death.

Talk about off-key energy!

The price of freedom for these women is enormous, and every one of them experienced a major health crisis in the aftermath of their escape. Listening to their stories, I wondered, “How much of this could be the off-key energy of their family and community?”

In Rebecca Musser’s book “The Witness Wore Red,” Becky talks about a cancerous growth at the base of her spine which caused her tremendous pain. A reiki practicioner, who knew nothing of Becky’s history, commented after a session “I think this tumour is the result of ill will being directed at you.”

Becky nearly fell on the floor, because the reiki lady had no way of knowing hundreds of people were praying for Becky’s death.

Where I live in Tofino, my friends of First Nations decent talk quietly about their customs and defences against negative energy. They’re always cautious about alluding to these parts of their cultures, for a lot of historical reasons including surviving cultural genocide, and so when something like this comes up in conversation I accept and respect the information.

One thing a friend always does is burn her tissues when she has a cold. If someone were to get a hold of those tissues, they could use it to exploit her temporary weakness and steal her life force.

There are stories about a person who uses off-key energy for hire. Basically, there’s someone around here you can hire to put a curse on your enemies, throw a kink into a business deal, create endless obstacles for those trying to create positive change.

I believe it, too. I think any kid who’s experienced bullying knows what off-key energy feels like, and how it builds up like plaque in the arteries of your life.

Sylvia Browne always said there’s no such thing as a curse, and I think that was a wise stance for her to take. There are too many fear-mongering woo-woo witches willing to convince you there’s a curse on you, and here’s a $500 talisman that will protect you for a week. That’s ridiculous. Never let anyone manipulate you with fear.

But I think it’s helpful to talk about the impact of off-key energy. It exists. We experience it.

I think Off-Key Energy is one of the reasons why kids and teens who are bullied / cyber bullied are more vulnerable to psychic and psychological damage leading to increased risk of suicide. Kids and teens are more vulnerable to what other people think, because other people’s thoughts about them have a direct impact on their lives. Kids and teens depend upon the adults and other kids around them to take care of them, and because a teacher, a parent or a friend can have a huge impact on your life, you’re going to tune UP your empathetic connection with those power figures in your life.

As an adult, we gain independence from the thoughts of others… to a point. We tend to ramp up that psychic / empathetic attachment to coworkers, friends and neighbours if those people have the power to significantly impact our lives. Family members have a special secret code to our defences too, intentional or not, sometimes family challenges each other more than anyone else in our lives.

So whether you’re a kid in school vulnerable to the thoughts of teachers and friends, or you’re a grown-ass person vulnerable to the influence of other adults, there is a psychic connection there. We get to be extra sensitive to those thoughts. We *know* when someone else is thinking, talking or feeling bad about and towards us. I believe this is a natural part of our human survival instincts. You’ve got to know if your co-worker is reporting on you, if your teacher has labelled you a bad kid, or if your boss is in a mood. It could affect your survival – that’s why we’re “tuned in”.

Here’s a hard lesson I’ve had to learn over and over and over again: It is not my job to internalize what other people think of me. Nor is it my job to be a peacekeeper, at the expense of myself. I don’t need to dance to their off-key energy.

It is my job to be myself, just who I am.

I am simply occupying space as my complete self, decompressing and expanding into the whole being I came here to be.

It reminds me of the “Fuck it” meditation John showed us as a joke a few years ago. I wish I’d written about it at the time, but I can’t seem to find anything in the blog! I remember telling my mother about this in one of our phone conversations. There was John Lennon, in awkward lotus pose, chanting: “Fuuuuuuck it. Fuuuuuuuck it all. It’s fucked.” This was followed by a strong visual of John PISSING into the pool of tranquility.

We had this conversation during a time when my Mom’s diet was terribly restricted after she was diagnosed with celiac disease. She made a “hamburger date” with John, to eat hamburgers and talk about their lives. I wonder if she’s had it yet? I’ll have to ask her.


I’m still trying to sort all this out. There will be more on this topic.

What do you guys think?? How have you experienced off-key energy? What things have helped? What didn’t help? If you were to advise your past selves, what would you tell them?

Ep. 34 Emotionally Challenging Pets

34 emotionally challenging pets

This was a tough one for me to talk about:  what happens when you feel your pet is too much?  What do you do when you’re over your head or at the end of your rope with a pet, particularly a dog?

Our little animal family has faced some new challenges: Happy has been attacking Sunshine as though he wants to kill her.  He locks in on her, and it’s gotten exponentially worse since Sunshine’s started taking medication for her hypothyroidism.  It has changed her smell, and Happy’s prey drive is nearly irresistible.

We talk about the *most* difficult dog situations, the challenges, judgment and even shame of “failure.”

How to cope when you feel you have limited choices with emotionally challenging pets.


How do you like the new podcast cover?  It’s like, HERE’S MY FACE!!!!  I like it though.  It looks more like me.

PS!  There’s some time remaining to get your $25 off your next pet session!  Click on the puppy to get yours!

Pet Reading Discount!

The weight of it.

Here’s how I handle emotional pain, primarily, and maybe a few of you can relate:  I totally eat my feelings.  I’ve been eating my feelings for the past two years.  I was just about ready to start taking off the bit of extra weight / baggage I’d gained in early 2014 when we got the news: Mom has a brain tumour.  It’s not good.

And I’ve been eating my feelings ever since.

Everyone has their coping mechanisms, and it can be great in the short term.  But here’s what happens when you eat your feelings: those feelings aren’t processed.  You’re just saving them for later, right along with the extra weight, or in the joints, or in the muscle.  We do have an understanding of “sense memory” but what I’m talking about it the next level of sense memory.  Body memory, maybe we’ll call it that.

Our bodies mark time, by the seasons, by the light, and by what we store in them.  What we experience in them.  What we hold on to, what we expel.  We have theories about what happens when we ignore the bad stuff for years, stuff it down inside, pack it away under layers of tissue that help us feel insulated and safe.  I think it comes out in illness, and injury.  Like when I threw out my back shortly after my last visit with my mother.

The first time I experienced this emotional release coinciding with weight loss was after a breakup with my last boyfriend, just before figuring out “Wow, I’m gay.  That explains a lot.”  I’d been eating my feelings in that relationship for a few years, and I had become obese.  It took me regular visits to a nutritionist nurse, weekly injections of vitamins and all my time and energy to take that weight off in the following year.

What I discovered during that year was that the weight was just the superficial thing.  It wasn’t the REAL thing.  The process of weight loss, the food diaries, the hours spend in planning and food prep, the hours spent fighting food cravings – that wasn’t the hardest part about losing that weight.   The toughest part was ALL the emotional crap that surfaced with every lost pound.

I would lose five pounds and remember our last fight.  The memory became an obsession and would pop back into my mind constantly throughout the day.  Some moments, I was practically re-living it.  I would lose another five pounds and remember the anxieties I had about money, his unemployment, his downward spiral.  I was reliving our relationship in reverse, as I was peeling the layers of onion fat on my body.
Once I realized what was happening, I started to notice it more often.  It wouldn’t be just weight loss that could trigger a stored emotion.  Exercise did it too.  I resisted exercise for years because a workout could trigger deep unhappiness, memories I thought I’d “let go of” or some random hurt feeling from my school years.  It was so difficult to take off those fifty pounds, I was pretty careful not to let them creep on again.  Ten pounds, okay.  Twenty pounds, alright, time for some action.

In the past two years, I’ve put on fifty pounds… while biking 15 km / day.

So here I am, situated in our wonderful little house.  All of our immediate needs are met.  I have little to worry me about the future right now.  No time bomb ticking for a loved one, no one knocking on our door or monitoring our laundry.  It’s time to work on my body.

I can understand why people never do this, how extra weight becomes obesity and then morbid obesity.  You need a safe place to deal with the emotions you’re trying to bury.  When you’re overwhelmed, there isn’t the time or space to feel the crap out of your feelings as they’re happening – or possibly, there are just too many damn feelings to deal with all at once.  If you’re like me, you ration your feelings.  You save some for later.  You eat some damn ice cream and do what needs doing!

Well, yeah.  And here I am, finally in a place to deal with this fallout.  I will.  I have before, I know I can.  But before I do, I had Melody Charlie, a wonderful and talented local photographer, take some photos with me at the beach.  I LOVED working with her.  She completely understood why I would use elementals like beach, sky, ocean, mountains in my website.  I didn’t have to explain how the connection with nature reflects our connection with spirit. She got it.  I have been a fan of her photos for years, and I was really happy to be working with her.  She’s one of those rare photographers who manages to capture the heart or energy of the moment.  I think it’s because she photographs with love.  We’re planning another session with her dog, and I would like to get some done with Sweetie (because all of our couple photos are selfies, and it’s been eight years already!)

These photos were just for me, to show myself that yeah, this is where I am when I’m larger, when I’m holding on to a lot of things.  I carry weight.  But you know what?  I carry it well.  I am beautiful.  It’s okay for me to be this size.  I am okay with how my body handles adversity.  It’s doing it’s job!  I am grateful It’s wonderful that I can put stuff away for later, carry it with me, let it go when I’m safe, when I have time.

As well, spending a couple of hours with someone exclaiming about how beautiful you are is a great way to start off a self-care journey.

It began today.  Kind of a rocky start.  Since I no longer have a bike commute, I joined the local gym again – I love this place.  Sauna, swimming pool, full weight room.  The gym is a nice place to go be with people but not be expected to interact with them.

I decided to start by replicating my bike commute – I was gratified to discover that my stamina is right where I left it a few months ago.  I’m still strong, I still have energy.  It’s a great place to start.  I used to hate cardio; this time, I returned from the gym feeling fantastic.

When I got home, I burst into tears.  I flipping lost it.  Tears, grief, I miss my Mom, I miss my cat, I miss my dog.  I was so so sad.  Just decimating grief.  Sweetie held me and fed me peanut butter on toast.  It helped.

It’s all heart chakra stuff.  I’m releasing the stuff that’s on top, that’s in my heart.

Based on past experience, the beginning is the most difficult.  The emotions and memories are the wildest, the most extreme.

The nutzoid part is the push-pull in my body.  Of course it’s better, healthier for me to release this stuff, feel the shit out of my feelings.  That’s what it’s about.  But there’s a very worried part of my body that wants to cram all that crap back down – eat eat eat eat!  I’ll have to do a crack-down food purge soon, and I’ll be leaning hard into my chocolate craving fix:  one banana, a handful of raspberries, a ton of cocoa powder and topped up with almond milk.  Barely any calories and I can convince my brain it’s a chocolate bar.

I think I’ll start using the Lose-It app on my ipod again.  If anyone else would like to join me, we can be Lose-It buddies.  The app lets you see / share what you’ve been eating, how you’ve been exercising, and you don’t have to share your weight if you’d prefer not to.  I’ll share mine.  You can find me using my email address, tofinopsychic@gmail.com

And hey, click on the image below if you want $25 off your next pet reading!

Pet Reading Discount!

Pet Reading Discount for Blog Members!

Woo Hoo!  It’s time for another DISCOUNT FOR PET READINGS!

Pet Reading Discount!

Pet readings are one of my favourite things to do – that’s why I like to discount them once in a while, just so I get to talk to your loveable and loving, observant and opinionated, funny and enthusiastic animal friends!

If you like to check in with your animal friends on how they’re feeling, why they do that strange thing, whether they have any wishes or wants, what their history is, or even what they think of other people in your life, now is the time!

If you’re a Blog Member, you have already been emailed your discount code to get $25 off a Pet Session with me!


(Click on “Redeem Coupon and enter your code!)

If you’re not already a member, you can sign up in the right hand menu, at the top.  My friendly scheduling robot will send you your Pet Session Discount coupon to your email (along with two more members-only coupons!)

This coupon will be valid for a limited time, book your spot now!

Thank you everyone!  We’ll talk soon!

Ep.33 Pet Reincarnation!

33 pet reincarnation

Here we go again!

We’re talking about Pet and Animal Reincarnation – dogs reincarnating along genetic lines or within human families!  Cats alternating “human companion” lives with feral lives!  Do souls stick to reincarnating within the same species?

Your pets’ past lives, their purpose and plans!  AND:

Listen for a special discount on your next Animal Communication session, launching July 7th!

The Mother: So what is your job, anyway?

Bruce: May individual spirits move freely from the purview of one oversoul to another or are souls “bound” in the main to one group? Can a member of the human oversoul extend a PORTION of his/her energy into another oversoul group for the experience, while retaining their abiding place within the human oversoul?

Kate: Okay, so, how flexible or fixed is a soul’s categorization as “human” or anything else? Some people (including Sylvia Browne) have said that a soul is distinctly specialized to a species – human souls incarnate only as humans, dogs only as dogs etc. Personally, this hasn’t sounded right to me, and there have been enough pet readings where human people’s pets describe their experiences as human in past lives. It’s very rare that when inquiring into a human’s past lives that an animal life comes up, though. It has happened, though.

So from the oversoul / mother perspective, how does that all work?

Mother: The beauty of channeling energy from source, through the branches of life, through your own body, brain and frame of references, is the answers conform to the context of the questions you have asked. Frequently, when a human asks about their past lives, they’re implicitly asking about past HUMAN lives. It would be delightfully funny if you said, “You were an amoeba!” It would very often be true!

It is useful to consider the consciousness’ journey to be evolutionary, as long as one does not use this evolutionary point of view to decide one form of life is “more evolved” and superior. It is human nature to assume superiority to others, it’s part of the adventure! No other animal on earth views itself as with such entitlement in exactly the same way.

(pause) Cats, and similar predators come close. (Loves cats, shows me lions as well as housecats. Shows me predatory animals feel and are entitled to their food, the lives and bodies of other animals. It’s in their nature, they could not exist, otherwise. In the same way, human nature orients us to feel entitled.)

The fascinating part (of this entitlement) is the evolution of human consciousness – humanity is the only species that is learning to DOUBT their entitlement to the things they’ve evolved to consume! No predator stops to consider converting to vegetarianism out of respect for the life of the prey animal! This is truly and earthly and human experience! I am truly delighted as this development!

(Shows me this “doubt” has been around for thousands of years, and began with fasting rituals. Fasting rituals were quickly utilized by spiritual leaders as ways to guide others through their own out-of-body experiences. Mild to moderate forms of self-poisoning followed.)

Humans are unique in their desire to LEAVE their bodies and experience their non-corporeal form WHILE they are incarnated! Such a contradiction! (Lots of love!)

Kate: To clarify, doubting our human entitlement isn’t the only purpose for human evolution / existence. There are many, many lessons at play.

Mother: (warmth) of course!


So, what is the “job” of the oversoul? If an individual consciousness can move through an amoeba group of incarnations and up through more complex life forms, mammals and then human…

Mother: (jumps in to correct an assumption) Not every consciousness has gone through a succession of incarnations as multiple species on a particular planet. Some beings specialize in incarnations as only one type of physical species. The consistency facilitates their understanding and learning. This is why many of the people / beings you will speak with have generally reincarnated along the same species. They are not bound to the species, the species best reflects their soul expression, how they exist and differentiate themselves from other forms of consciousness.

(reminds me) the branching off (creation) of individual soul consciousness can occur in a number of ways. Most plant, animal and inscect species on earth have branched off from the earth’s own source consciousness. You could consider the earth to be the “mother” of all these species, including humanity.

The exceptions are the increasing long-term visitors (translates both as “visitors” and “immigrants”) An individual being may be specialized in the experiences of another planet, and gained the desire to experience the complexities and challenges of earth. There are many (thousands, maybe more?) beings who are WAITING to incarnate on this challenging planet, to experience rapid growth. Physical bodies on earth are limited, and genetic lines of humanity are reserved by soul groups.

Kate: So a soul from another planet couldn’t just jump into a human life because they wanted to, they have to be in cooperation with the souls that have been incarnating for a while? One soul can’t bump another soul out of line, right?

Mother: Yes, the planning is complex. There are occasions where an outside soul is welcomed into a soul family / group incarnating on earth to help break negative behavior patterns the genetic line is experiencing (abuse, aggression, other unbalanced or destructive behaviours.)

Ask me about soul families, next time!

Animals which have evolved alongside humanity begin (and choose) to develop more complex life plans. Domesticated animals frequently reincarnate as other domesticated animals, even if they choose a different species. Their soul consciousness is interested in the domesticated animal experience alongside humanity.

To answer your question simply, the oversoul in attendance of a particular life is determined by the physical species that soul is experiencing. Yet an oversoul does not determine the path of that soul. Mothers influence their children, but they can not control where they go, or what they do!


So what is the “job” of the oversoul?

Mother: The oversoul is needed to ground and centralize the intent of the very existence of the species. The intent of humanity is complex (shows me a sparkly diamond “many faceted”). The intent of a species of tree is simple: to hold ground, to witness, to preserve, to nurture, to grow, to die, to perpetuate.

Humanity’s intent could be boiled down to these same terms, but this explanation would feel unsatisfactory to many! (love)

Human Oversoul… Alien Oversouls???

2015-06 oversoul

Picking up where we left off yesterday, we were talking to the human oversoul, aka The Mother.



Do aliens have oversouls …… each variety with its own? Does the human oversoul naturally engage well or poorly with different ones?



Yes! There are many beautiful planets with living, incarnated children. You are asking about the three known species (shows me tall whites, short pinks, short greys.) They are all loving, beauful beings, although each species has it’s own challenges. The nature of their incarnations are different, particularly the (short pinks) who inhabit their bodies like you communicate with animals. They are less bound by incarnation, and more studying sensuous existence.

Yes, the planets and the oversouls of off-earth species communicate with the oversouls of earthly species. There are species-sharing, species that are inter-related across planets. Earth is not an isolated anomaly! If humans are my children, other intellectual species with similar capacities for logical thought and communication would be your cousins.

There are many species that are similar across planetary ecosystems. Start with macro-life. Amoeba have oversouls. This is the very source of intelligent design! Evolution is not random, for heaven’s sake! Not at all! How would anything be accomplished if left to chaos and chance? Chaos will always fall to order, to system and ultimately, to evolution, even in the “vacuum” of space.

Kate: I swear you guys, she just made a joke about mothers needing vacuums. “Every Mother needs a vacuum! Ha ha!” I had to do a double-take. Did that just happen, or was that me? The thing is, *I* wouldn’t make a joke like that. Did the Mother just make a joke and my knee-jerk reaction was “Hey! That’s sexist!” My reaction is part of why it’s funny!

I wish there was a way to write about what just happened without butchering the joke by explaining it! There were so many layers to that one, and the Mother is asking me to have a sense of humour about myself, too! I appreciate the reminder.



Are oversouls planet-linked? Does the range of a given oversoul ever extend to other planetary systems?


Yes, it is useful to think of the relation as ancestral. If I am the mother of humanity as it exists today, and I relate to you in near-human form, the next “level” is my OWN parents. Imagine again, the light and the crystal refraction. If the colours red, blue and purple are formed by a crystal, the crystal is their mother. But who is the parent of the light before it refracted?

At some point, you return to the source of the light, which is useful to think of as “Source” or “God” or “Universe” or even nothingness, mere potential, the silence before the BANG!

There are ancestors all along the line of evolution. Every branch has a Mother, an oversoul. This is why a diverse species like dogs require many oversouls! A great-grand parent for all dog-like creatures, whose children created wolves, jacklys, foxes and dogs. The dog branch bloomed out BEAUTIFULLY! So many different flowers! How do you fit so many flowers on to one plant? It continues to branch out. The oversoul forms based on the need of the species, or the sub-species, and the oversoul you perceive / connect with depends on how you address your questions and to whom.

The answers you receive depend upon who you ask, and the context of your questions.

Some species share oversouls across planets. Plants are highly specialized, and their oversouls (so-named Devas in my brain because I’ve read the Findhorn books) are specialized. There are oversouls of small ecosystems, oversouls of particular plants and oversouls of the very earth and compost.

Compost! The wonderful collection of micro-organizms which transform life, which yield new life and support ALL life on earth! You have not even THOUGHT to ask about the most vital oversoul of all – the Mother of SMALL LIFE!

The Mother of microscopic life is essentially the earth herself. These microorganisms control the world, control the fate of the planet, begin and end all life.



There seems to be some kind of hierarchy …. or structure, at least, in spirit. How do oversouls fit into that structure? What lies “above,” “below,” or “beside” the oversoul classification? (I realize that there may well not be a “higher or lower,” but there are “proximities” and inter-relationships of some sort.)



I believe we have addressed your question with the refracting light and the branching flowers – life is the expansion, the growth. Hierarchies can be seen to exist – such as the food chain. Microscopic life is consumed by ever-larger species until you reach the apex predator. Yet the predator is dependent upon every block in the pyramid, or it would cease to exist in that form. The lion is decended from, and dependant upon the infinetly small microscopic processes that support his existence on earth.

Kate: So, wait. Could the bacteria in the gut of the lion be perceived as the lion’s spiritual grandparents?


Mother: It doesn’t appear that’s a useful image for you, and for others. Let’s look at it like a forest. The lion is not the most important creature in the forest, though he might be the loudest. The lion’s very existence depends upon the existence of the forest, and so the oversouls and devas of all the species in the ecosystem are connected to each other.

Sometimes, these oversouls have been perceived as fighting each other. This is why humanity creates stories about gods who fight, the sun is chasing the moon! You can see the “battles” as the mere pruning of the branches, creating room for new growth, new evolution, new lessons, further generations of children!


**** There’s more to come! Keep your eye out next week!

**** In the right hand sidebar **** Subscribe to the blog to receive posts right in your email, and Become a Blog Member for special discounts on Kate’s Services!

Your Questions answered! The Human Oversoul

2015-06 oversoul

A while back on the Joyful Telepathy podcast,  I did an episode about “oversouls”.   (Here it is.)  In a nutshell, An oversoul is the level of consciousness that is higher up the chain, closer to source, than the incarnated individuals.

I used the example of the sea urchins – a single urchin, when broken off of the bunch, will have a single voice – but unless you cut it off, the whole colony of urchin will speak with a single voice, just like the Borg from Star Trek. This is a hive mind, not an oversoul. This hive mind consciousness happens whenever there’s a group of individuals that don’t differentiate themselves from their fellows. Herd animals, flock animals, inscects – all these creatures can experience hive / collective consciousness. They don’t HAVE TO, it’s more a phenomena that seems to happen. I’ve spoken with chickens that see themselves as unique and separate from the others, and I’ve spoken with chickens who experience life as a group – who are so close to their feathered companions they’re practically tethered together, telepathically. It’s a useful state of mind, especially for prey animals. Why limit yourself to two sets of eyes when you could see out of sixteen?

Collective consciousness or hive minds are for incarnated beings, it’s blurring the lines that separate us as incarnated individuals. Oversouls is something else again, it’s higher.

Consciousness manifests itself as you address it. This is why, when our loved ones cross over, they appear to us as their most recent incarnation – that’s how we know them, and how we’ll relate to them.

When you think of an oversoul, don’t think of this as a separate angel / queen / god of the species, but as a way the consciousness has of manifesting itself to us so that we can understand and relate to that level of knowledge.

For me, whenever I’ve accidentally or intentionally addressed oversouls, I get a vision of a majestic ruler of that species, or even of that type of animal. The husky / sled dogs of the north have an accessible oversoul, for example. So do Chihuahuas, so do herding dogs. I think this centralization of consciousness helps the incarnated species, somehow. I have all sorts of theories about this, but I this is going to be a long post and I want to stay on track.

As I was saying, a while back on the podcast I put out a request for questions for the Human Oversoul. For months, I didn’t get any questions. I let it drop, thinking the audience wasn’t really interested in that topic… and because I couldn’t really think of anything to ask. Where do you start? It’s such a huge idea.

Fortunately, my friend Bruce came up with LOTS of questions to get us going! I was so happy! Then I promptly lost this list of questions and stopped everything while my life reorganized itself.

Kindly, Bruce has re-sent these questions. Fabulous! But then, I found myself blocked, FOR WEEKS. I was actually having trouble accessing the a Human Oversoul.

What was I doing wrong? Was I going too far up the consciousness chain? Was I really trying to address “God” in a roundabout way, or the planet Earth’s consciousness? Something about the way I was approaching the contact wasn’t gelling, wasn’t working for me.

And then it clicked, in one beautiful moment. I would address “The Mother”. Not the “Human Oversoul” exactly, but the creative source of humanity, the love, the emotion, rather than the intellect. It’s not intellect or intelligence that binds us humans together on a spiritual / energetic level – it’s EMOTION that is at the crux of the human experience.

The way I’m tuned, particularly after my mother’s death, I thought I’d address the idea of the “Human Oversoul” as “The Mother” figure of humanity. What if I addressed this level of consciousness as the loving mother of all of us? What if I tapped into the unconditional love of a spiritual mother figure?

Jackpot. And the answers began to flow.

We’ll break this into three parts. Here it is: Part 1.


The Mother appears surprisingly short, as though she manifested first for our ancesters, our common humanity before we spread across the globe.


What was the very beginning of the human species we know today?


There have been three blooms of my children. The first blossom was a failure (shows me just a few hundred people, all wiped out.) The second bloom over ten thousand years ago, the creation of a branch of brothers and sisters who did not survive into modern times (shows me a short stature and nearly unbreakable bone-density, large teeth, quiet peaceful natures.) The third bloom happened eight thousand years ago, and cascades over the earth today. You choose which species of humanity (choose the place where you’d like to mark as the beginning.)


There appear to be stages in the development of human beings. Was there a time when hominid precursors of homo sapiens (as we now call ourselves) were just too primitive to fit into the human oversoul? Conversely, will a time come when the race develops beyond the need for an oversoul?


Do you ever outgrow the need for a mother?

An oversoul can be viewed as the overseeing mother of the collective experience of a manifest consciousness. (Shows me the soul bubbles.)  How you define the birth of humanity will affect how you define me, and my form will shift to assist your understanding in the context of your questions. There is always an oversoul, life is not possible without a mother.

“Primative” is a selection, a division among children / family. A mother may have a “primitive” child, as defined by that child’s abilities in the context of her environment. A mother may have a child who thrives in that environment and is “gifted”. She loves them both. She worries about them both. She works to guide, protect and preserve them both. Mothers, ultimately, release their children to their own lives, to the world, to their own decisions, to their fate. There was a time when it was *expected* that mothers would see some or all of their children die. I mourn my “primitive” children in the past, I am the immortal soul consciousness of all of humanity.

Where this consciousness, this knowledge, begins and ends, is defined by your question. I am *delighted* your first question poses such a paradoxical answer!

(She explains that a paradox is an answer that seems impossible to nail down, that may be correct and wrong at the same time. She doesn’t explain this for Bruce’s benefit, but for all the people in the future who don’t know what “paradoxical” means and who won’t look it up, because it’s the mother’s responsibility to anticipate the educational needs of her children!)


Bruce: Some say that humans were always humans and the various stages of early man were unique unto themselves and really separate species. If so, did these early hominid have their own distinct oversoul(s).

Kate: I need to reword this for my own brain to process it: Okay. Imagine the image of the ape evolving into a man.

2015-06 human-evolution


At what point on that scale do you say, “THAT is no longer an ape, that is a human – or that is Early Human Version 1.” Does Early Human V1 have it’s own mother oversoul? When did it separate from the oversoul of the “Ape”? Is the oversoul of Early Human V1 different from the Ape oversoul, and different from the Mother I’m talking to right now?

Mother: (feeling of delight) Yes! As you define and perceive the differences between animal, early human and human, the oversoul becomes tangible. Let me show you.

(Shows me a triangle crystal, refracting a beam of light into a rainbow of colour.) Your perception of this image – you see a white light travelling through the crystal and separating into six colours. Six species of light. Each colour has a unique experience.

If you address Purple as a species, you can talk to her oversoul. You can relate to all things Purple, the purpose of Purple, how Purple experiences life on earth. As Purple expands, she needs her own mother. She *perceives* her mother to be different from the mother of Red or Blue.

In this way, ALL CHILDREN on earth have unique mothers. Their *experience* of their mother was unique to their own lifetime, different from their siblings. A mother may answer questions differently to individual children, depending upon that child’s needs, depending on how the question is framed and timed.

And so again, in order to answer your question definitively, I would need to ask you, beautiful one, to choose the parameters.

The Purple exists because you perceive it to be different and separate from the other colours. The Purple’s mother could be at the beginning of the refraction, or the crystal itself could be addressed as the Mother of all colour on earth.

How you choose to address and define the oversoul is how the higher levels of creation manifest their answers. The answers are always defined by and adapted to the child’s current level of development and understanding. Beautiful child, the answers to your questions will change over time! Please keep asking!


Bruce: How do the various oversouls interrelate with one another? Are they indeed entirely discrete? Do some oversouls naturally have a smoother “interface” than others? Are there some that repel each other?

Kate: Sorry, Bruce, in medium mode I often have to re-word questions so that I can incorporate and fully understand your question, before I can ask it and understand the answer. In my own words, are oversouls able to speak to each other? Are there big oversoul conferences? Can they perceive each other? Do some miss each other entirely because of differences in their levels, vibrations – whatever?


Understand, your question stems from your human existence. You impose your human form on your ideas of oversouls, and those ideas frame your questions.

As you imagine the oversoul to be the mother of a particular species or group experience, you can easily imagine there are parent-teacher conferences! And so there are!

Parents and teachers gather to discuss the needs of the kids, what is happening (good or bad, healthy or not) and how the progression can be corrected, directed, assisted.

As the Mother of humankind, my concern is for the human children. As needed, I conference with the parents of other children (other species on earth who are impacted by humanity.)



Wow, Humanity must look like an out-of-control school yard bully on earth right now, to the other oversouls of the planetary species.



Yes, but there is no outrage, anger or jealousy that you would see in a human parent – teacher conference. The other parents are concerned for the welfare of their children, but there is no vilifying of humankind. The human family as a species is a product of their in-born needs. The behavior, disrupting as it is on other species, is driven by human need, their inborn desires.

These desires shift and evolve over time, and grow to accommodate the perceived environment.

In your own words, the difference between the woman who blocks the cutting of an ancient tree is one of the humans who can hear and feel the pain of the tree as it is felled. The human holding the chainsaw has no idea of the tree’s pain – he has his own children, and the death of this tree will feed his children.

Maybe, one day, all of humanity will perceive the consciousness and experience of the tree. Right now, many can more easily relate to the needs of the logger’s children. So logging continues. This is the story behind the oppression of many species by humanity.

We, the oversouls of the collective consciousness of incarnated species, have parental love and empathy for the logger, the tree and the human blockade. These conferences are regular – you would perceive them as constant! Rest assured that all of the children on the planet are being represented by oversouls.

Now, how do we define those oversouls? They are not like humans, or how you would perceive angels. They are closer to a Pantheon of Gods, a “God” for each element, species, every interest on the planet. The planet too, as you know, has an accessible consciousness as well, easily accessed as a “Mother”.

Why do you think humans created the phrase, “God made humans in his image?” (laughs) Because HUMAN MEN accessed their image of God in THEIR OWN image! Isn’t that delightful!

(Acknowledges my thoughts)


Kate: I was just thinking how much the energy of the Mother feels familiar, and I was trying to decide if this was the same energy I felt while talking to Mother Earth,  to Mary Magdeline, or is it some other being, an angelic energy? I was just thinking “Why is this energy so familiar”. The Mother answered me in that acknowledgment that HER energy was present in all of those interactions!


Many, many millions of humans access me through the portal of the icon of “Mother Mary” or the “Virgin”. Mary Magdeline freely and openly accesses and channels me! So when you channel her, you channel Mary Magdeline channeling me, in her own way! (laughs). She enjoys drawing the oversoul energy through her, and takes every opportunity to connect humanity with their Mother.


And yes, oversouls are learning (expanding) too!



Do aliens have oversouls …… each variety with its own? Does the human oversoul naturally engage well or poorly with different ones?


*** OHHHH! We’ll answer this one tomorrow!

Ep. 32 – Talk to your pets!

32 talk to your pets!

This episode I recorded nearly two weeks ago, but thanks to my own silliness in fiddling with the wireless modem, I managed to screw up my internet connection.

I blame Mercury.

Anyway, it’s all uploaded and ready for a listen!  I’ve answered a few questions I received over the past few months on facebook about talking with your pets and how to know when you’re succeeding.  How can you tell if your pet “gets” the message?

I hope you enjoy it!