Sweetie sends this follow up to the previous post.

I just read that article you linked to in the blog about Nirvana and feminism.  It mentioned Mia Zapata and I remembered that I forgot to mention that I had actually talked to her.  (Sort of).

I first learned about her in Inga’s book, but her name came up again because Nirvana had participated in the fundraiser to hire investigators to find her killer (it still took something like 10 years).

From the article:

Musicians and artists from Seattle, especially, but also those elsewhere, rallied immediately following Zapata’s death. Acts such as Pearl Jam, Soundgarden, Nirvana, the Posies and Bratmobile staged benefit concerts that raised money to hire a private investigator to find Zapata’s killer. Collectively, they raised approximately $70,000, which paid the PI for three years. Eventually the bills became insurmountable. Now that Mezquia has been arrested, the remaining small sum will be given to women’s groups.

So I watched a bit of the documentary about her, and they interviewed Joan Jett (who is this awesome, badass rock chick, who was awesome and badass years before women really did that).  Joan is talking about her, and she starts to cry, all these years later.  Which made me cry.

And then Mia shows up, and she’s not really saying anything, but I can just feel her there.  She’s wordlessly projecting strength and determination at me.

I’m not sure if she actually spoke to me at all, but I began to understand that she didn’t really want me to be angry or sad about what happened to her.  That yes, it was shitty, but that it’s far more important to put energy into my own self expression than to put energy into outrage.  (Probably not broad advice for everyone, just specific advice for me as I’m already informed about feminist issues, and sufficiently angry).  And that her voice was silenced, and I shouldn’t silence my own because of fear.  Basically that my contribution to feminism doesn’t even *need* to be political — just be a woman, doing awesome things.  Be seen doing it.
 
Anyway, that was Mia.

I decided not to watch the rest of her documentary because they were really just eulogizing her and I didn’t expect to learn anything I didn’t already know.  And it would only evoke more anger/sadness, which isn’t what’s needed.