Steve with a Goana, an animal I only know about because I used to watch his show.

Okay Steve, get ready – would you like to-

TOO RIGHT! YEAAAAH! (and he’s using what I think is aussie slang in place of “making love”, and since I can’t hear it, he’s talking about when animals “reproduce.”)

Steve! Slow down please, I can’t follow you when you go this quickly,

SORRY! RIGHT! (I’m going to take the cap locks off, but be assured, he’s still coming through with a high, strong energy.)

(Shows me a large female croc, with a male on top of her) The male, he risks his life to make love to his beautiful female! (Shows me the female turning on him and snapping.) She’s a cranky one! (Shows me other males bearing the wounds of mating encounters, one male with missing toes, another with a piece missing from his mouth.) Although the females are fierce, the males prove they are worthy and brave, they’re driven by their natural instincts to reproduce, which is greater than their fear of the female, who may be larger and stronger, who may even kill him!

The spider (EEEEEK! I don’t need a super-close-up of spiders, zoom out! Zoom out! It’s like I have an episode of croc hunter in my head.) This female spider (she looks small, with a black and orange body, she’s hour-glass shaped) kills her mate when she’s done with him! Then she eats him! Poor Romeo! (Then he shows me the spirit from the male spider who rejoins the spirit world happily after the female is finished consuming his body.)

See how his body is a gift to his love? He gave everything to her, the nutrients in his body will contribute to the bodies of the new babies! Resources are scarce, this is why the male sacrifices himself – it’s the ultimate romantic gesture. Without this meal, the female and the babies would not survive. (Shows me a scientist taking the male body away from the female in a lab, and the female being so upset as they pry the body away from her with metal tools, and then she dies suspended in her web, unable to live.) I used to say to Terri, (shows me roses as a romantic gift for humans, and how it pales in comparison to the ultimate mating sacrifice of many insects. She laughs and says something back to him which is private and I don’t hear it.)

You know Steve, I’m bothered when people talk about humans being superior to animals. I think we’re just different, and because we’re dominating and manipulating the planet on a grand scale, that doesn’t mean we’re superior in an evolutionary or a spiritual way. But it’s tough to talk to people to get them to see it that way.

(Steve shows me all the bacteria on earth and points out that technically, they are dominating the planet. They control our digestive systems, our disease/parasite/normal flora balance in our bodies, they can wipe us out, they are “Mother Earth’s Tiny Army” and Steve reminds us to be humble.)

Wow. Is it like Jurassic Park, that move where the lysine contingency is designed to kill all the dinosaurs if they get out of hand?

Mother nature is always in balance, even now, which is a great relief to me on this side (the spirit world). Sometimes, I would get SO SAD thinking we were killing beautiful creatures and they’d be gone forever. I see it differently now. It is still so important for the survival of humanity as a species, to understand how we are a part of nature (shows me a spider web everything connected, a delicate, fragile construction). It is vitally important, (he means literally vital) to protect the diversity of species on this planet, we have so much to learn from them, and this is why I love them.

Yeah, like animals dying after mating being an experience of love, and dying in the throes of mating being this ultimate culmination of physical life. Not a bad way to go really.

(Steve shows me fish, looks like steelhead salmon, a male dying after fertilizing a female’s eggs. I’ve watched migrating salmon, and it’s absolutely amazing. The male will defend the female, expend so much energy, even push her over difficult jumps to help her upriver. Sometimes after fertilizing eggs, the male salmon crash, grow weak and wait to die. This is where the bear come into their element. What I didn’t notice before is what Steve is showing me now, which is how the fish feels: he feels content, utterly fulfilled, complete, happy, and is ready to slip out of his body and later, into a new hatchling. Giving his body to the eagle or bear is the ultimate culmination of his life’s purpose, and so he’s fulfilled in a way that many in human body will not experience.)

Wow, I’m actually a bit envious of that salmon right now.

Yeah, you were a bit upset this morning, eh?

Yeah, I was, sometimes human issues can feel overwhelming. I think that sometimes humans believe we’re the only ones who experience profound emotion, and I know that’s not true, but I never really thought about animals emotions surrounding their reproduction, and this sense of complete fulfillment you’re showing me, well it’s peaceful. It’s making me feel better, because you really can’t screw life up, not when you’re trying.

That’s the important thing, that you try! That you do it! It doesn’t matter if it happens the way you want it to work out, it’s alright. Of course we want things to be a certain way, that’s all part of it, the energy of (shows me a snowflake with a crystal formation expanding outwards.)

So, I hesitate to ask, but it’s weighing on my mind. You’re saying it’s important to do everything we can to save the whales, for example, but to not feel like a failure every time something bad happens to them.

Aw no, it’s important to feel bad. That’s all part of it too. Life is meaningless if you can’t feel bad when bad things happen. The meaning comes from the struggle upstream. (The salmon again.) He doesn’t know if he’s going to make it, but he tries with all his might! Every moment, he’s trying! That’s love. (Not just a romantic love for an individual, he’s showing me universal love and oneness.)

God, that’s tough to wrap my mind around, but I understand it, I feel like I understand it. Thank you Steve.

Aww, you’re welcome.

Uh, hey Steve, I’m just re-reading this before posting it, and a thought popped in about a biography / movie about your life. Is that happening?

Yeah, well, it’s something Terri’s thinking (been approached?) about, but to her, the children are most important, she doesn’t want to do anything to (make them sad, bring sadness back to the family.) You know (the film would) focus a lot on the death. (shows me Kurt, and how the death sometimes overshadows the rest of the story.)

Well maybe one day, when the kids are grown up, eh? Maybe they’ll do a movie themselves, or their lives will continue your family’s legacy by example. Actually, I’d love that, to hear your kids’ stories, in twenty years. You really have such an inspiring life, and you continue to do your work with the animals, with the earth on that level. I’m just (full of admiration / awe.)

Aw! (blush/bashful, he doesn’t really take a direct compliment and he directs me back to the earth, that the work is what’s important.)